A nail biting story...
A young executive was nervously biting her nails....
a.
She was late for the business presentation. Damn Traffic
b.
She was waiting to get the annual appraisals letter today
c.
Her boss wanted to her to do overtime wherein in-laws wanted her to be home by
6.
d.
She was hungry and her nails were real chew worthy
e.
She was suspecting a pregnancy & she & her husband were not
prepared to bring up a child now
f.
Any other....(pl specify)
Seema pondered over a while, going through each
option and weighing them carefully. It was the last question of her
computer administrative test and she could do anything but risk it. This
question meant a lot for her as it was her last chance to secure additional ten
marks in this exam.
She
took a deep breath and finally ticked the last option "f-
Any other". She has to specify as well. Seema wrote- Low bone calcium, making her nails brittle
and causing her to bite nails.
“What
are you crazy? How did you know it would be that? It could be any of these
options”. Asked her friend Trishala who was a law student.
“Tri,
I am a medical student and such questions are very hypothetical in nature. I
wrote what I deem right” quipped Seema.
“That’s
your assumption Seema. How do you know it’s true? You could have lost ten marks
for it, for all you know” said Trishala who was still not convinced with
Seema’s logics.
“I
know it Tri. After all, computer too confirmed my answer by adding that
additional ten marks in my score” said, a triumphed Seema. “Now, please no more
discussions on this. Exam is finally over; let’s go to law college square tapri (tea stall) to have a fresh ginger
cardamom tea. My in laws would be waiting and I need to get home by 6:00pm”.
__________________________________
As
the teacher read the above excerpt in the class for logical deduction. Mia, sitting
in the far end corner of the class smirked and looked befuddled. She made
furtive notes on her note book and thrown a glance over her half chewed nails.
She was hungry and waiting desperately for class to get over. Much to her
dismay, the lecturer, post reading the excerpt, challenged a question in front
of the class to justify the reason behind Seema’ choice and also to bring new
dimensions to the questions by adding new alternatives.
Each
one came with a different reasoning. While a certain sect of students agreed
with Seema’s deduction whereas to promote new thinking and generate a healthy
debate many came up with other alternatives. The lecturer just then noticed the
restlessness in Mia’s eyes and asked her take on this, suddenly the bell rang
and class had to disperse for the day. It was great relief for Mia, the final
year MBA student.
It
was 6:00 pm when Mia reached her home. Her mother was sitting in the porch,
making tea for her guest and friend Shalu. “Oh there comes Mia. OMG she has
grown in to a fine looking young lady” remarked aunt Shalu who was seeing Mia
almost fter six months.. “Come join us for tea. Shalu aunty got us some fine
earl Grey from Darjeeling. She brought your favorite lavender flavor too” asked
her mother, slipping a hot cuppa in Mia’s hands. She couldn’t help notice her
half chewed nails but before she could ask, Mia started the talk. “Ummm the
aroma is just superb, out of world. Thank you Shalu aunty” she said with her
eyes closed indulging in fine aromatic experience of her tea before sipping it away
to glory. “It’s too soothing, esp after the heavy duty nail biting logical
deduction theory discussion today. Oh my God, I am still confused how did protagonist
was so sure about that nail biting question”?
“Nail
biting question? What is that Mia, share with us so that see if can contribute
something to your conclusions” asked her mom inquisitively.
Mia
told her and Shalu aunty about the excerpt and they listened in steady silence.
As Mia finished talking, her phone rang and it was her friend on other line.
Mia excused herself from the porch asking the two ladies to continue their
discussion.
As
she left Shalu heaved a sigh and looked at Mia’s mom in great disbelief. She
couldn’t help but asked “How could this happen? How the author did know that
this happened? It was between you and me”.
“Do
you remember that at the beginning of college each of us were asked to share
our one most bizarre/ interesting part while going through the first medical CAT
in India? I gave this incident” replied Mia’s mom.
“Phew,
I never expected it will come to us this way. Thank God they changed the
names”. said Shalu.
“Thank
God, Mia didn’t notice that we too are doctor and lawyer. Tee hee come let me
treat you another cup of tea, exactly the type we use to get at law college
square Tapri” winked Mia’s mom.
As
12 years old Saina finished reading the story, she closed
the book and went to her mother. “Mom do people bite their nails because of
lack of calcium” She asked.
“Well
poppet, a lot of them do. Some does out of nervousness as well. However, the
majority of research pointed it to lack of bone Calcium”.
“Hmmm
that is why you ask me to drink milk every day, mom”? asked Saina.
“Yes
Poppet, it is important for us females to intake daily calcium to protect our
bones. That’s why I insist you to drink at least 1 glass of milk daily. Now,
finish you glass of milk and go to bed, I have to reach office early tomorrow,
I have a business presentation and I do not want to be late for it”.
“No
mom, not today. I am feeling over fed with that extra helping of rice. I will
do tomorrow, for sure. Now shall I go to sleep pl”? asked Saina.
“Ok,
but tomorrow for sure” Said her mom, Anjana while turning off her room’s
lights.
_____________________________________________________________
Anjana was sitting at her desk and biting her
nails nervously. Her colleague came and asked what the matter is? Is she
nervous for being late for the business presentation or in surmounting tension of upcoming
appraisal letter?
“Well
not exactly” Said Anjana. “I am worried, as I doubt a second pregnancy. My
husband and I are not very sure to bring a child now.
______________________________end of post_____________________________
Well that was my "story in story"
take for the Blogadda WoW theme wherein we have to write a story starting with - A
young executive was nervously biting her nails...
Hope
you like reading it. It was my first attempt creating “story within a story”-
all in record time (read deadline) of 40 mins. Do leave your comments.
Great concept...and an excellent achievement if u managed it in 40 mins.
ReplyDeleteBut ekta ekta ekta, you have this very bad habit of not proofreading your story before publishing it. I have noticed it earlier as well. When we type so fast, there will be some errors which can be revealed only during proofreading.
Actually, these are small little things which affect the reader.
Here are some instances-
a. "suddenly the bell rang and class has to disperse for the day." (error: it would be 'class had to disperse')
b. "Well poppet, a lot of them does it nervousness as well" (error: should be 'a lot of them do it out of nervousness as well)
PS- I hope you would proofread from next time. That would help you achieve perfection :))
Hey Ritesh!
DeleteI am glad that you liked my post and thanks for detailed analysis. I understand the typos but as I mentioned I wrote the post all in 40 mins where I changed the plot thrice and emphasis was more on story than anything. I did draft it on Word and since I was nearing deadline, I published it thinking to return to rectify.
I do proof read a lot of times but generally it takes a backseat due to time or other occupation. I read ur comment in the morning and changed my mind to re do it later.
Okay, don't worry. My blessings are with you. Amen :) :P
DeleteNo worries buddy...read now. I finally managed some time to edit what I actually wanted to express without changing my context. Thanks to u, I re read my post:)
DeleteNice read at the heart of it.
ReplyDeleteThansk so much, Gyanban!
Deletegud job...really liked your style of writing
ReplyDeleteThanks Utopian! Keep reading.
DeleteRead it from the very first word to the very last.. so simple and so impressive. Loved the ending and hate milk.
ReplyDeleteThanks Young big mouth. Many thanks for liking it.
Deletea story within a story - simplicity weave its own magic. good read, Ekta. :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks rat...Thanks for liking the concept :)
DeleteI like your writing style..flawless !:)
ReplyDeleteThanks so much, Kitty :) :)
DeleteInteresting style, very different infact. Well done and ATB for the Contest.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much Meenakshi! Well it ain't any contest just a theme based writing. I am glad u liked my experimentation.
DeleteThanks Ali!
ReplyDeleteThat was a nail biting tale!
ReplyDeleteYeah!
DeleteΙt's wonderful that you are getting thoughts from this article as well as from our discussion made at this time. simply click the following internet site
ReplyDeleteA good attempt on this nail biting concept :) Truly It felt like one Ekta. Nice one :)
ReplyDeleteThanks so much Saurabh! I am glad u liked and appreciated it!
DeleteYou are capable writer and i see that you can write better. May be you are not focused.
ReplyDeletehttp://neoimaginations.blogspot.com/
Thanks Neo. At the end of the day, its my personal blog. My focus is only for commercial writing :)
DeleteImpressive...I liked the style.. :)
ReplyDeleteGood combination of stories.. By the way, I think people also bite nails out of habit..
ReplyDeleteBrilliant..I loved it..:)
ReplyDeleteI am regular reader, how are you everybody? This piece of writing posted at
ReplyDeletethis site is truly pleasant.
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Reached here through Indiblogger...
ReplyDeleteI liked the concept. Sort of like a picture in a picture in a picture...
But I agree with the first comment...there are a few slight mistakes...it puts off the reader...unless he's seen your blog's rank in Indiblogger and comes here with high expectations...in which case he'll read till the end and comment as well :)
Awesome.. Writing such a story and that too in only 40 minutes. Hats off to you.
ReplyDelete