3 Idiots, Twitter & NumeroUnity

January 05, 2010 40 Comments

These days, every second person I meet, asks me one perennial question- Have you seen the movie Three idiots? However, before I could reply, they throw a bucket of advisory superlatives [another perennial object] on me- You must watch, it is an excellent, brilliant, superb-dooperb movie. “Not yet, I have though read the book and loved it too”, is my defense missile until I met Khanna aunty one day and this conversation happened-

“The book”? Oh, the movie is not as same that book, it is in news also. That Producer guy was so loud; he said “shut up to the journalist”. How outrageous these film people are”.

“Aunty, he just said shut up to a person in fit of emotional turbulence. It is just a plain shut up… “No no, how dare someone can say shut up to media yaar! If media shuts up, all these films will shut down [and vice versa]. These filmmakers have grown too big for their boots; they live on the money that we pay to watch their stupid movies, download some ringtones, merchandizes etc. But this 3 idiots movie was nice ha. Nevertheless, that does not mean a producer can humiliate any journalist that way”.

“True, I agree aunty but the poor chap, he has apologized to media later”. “Yes he is a poor chap; see what that publicity hunger writer bhagat singh is doing to him. He is claiming the movie to be his own story and trying to earn more money for his paperback books”.

“Aunty his name is Chetan Bhagat and he is not wrong, as the story is taken from his book only. Moreover, he is one of best selling Indian author and may not need such a cheap publicity”. [Producer of VVC films is poor. Since when?]

“No- no beta, you do not know these people. He already took big fat money from the producers and now the movie is super hit, he is black mailing to get more money and awards. That munnabhai guy wrote this story. What is his name I forgot, ya Raju Chopra. Is he Yash chopra’s brother?”

“His name is Abhijat Joshi and he has written the screenplay for the movie. The basic plot however, is from the book. By the way, have you read the book aunty? It was an amazing book”.

“No, no who has such time to read such big books on engineering colleges. They said on TV that the movie very different from that book”. “Who said that movie is different from the book, aunty? Media is on author’s side”

Arre, Media to kuch bhi bolti hai. Aamir khan is saying and I know, Amir Khan is never wrong. See he saved poor Indian farmers from paying tax to British, helped poor mental child and even fought that Ghazini villain who killed his girl friend. He is so cute.”

“Aunty, he is a good actor and was just essaying the role and that child was not mental, he has symptoms of Dyslexia.” “You mean to say beta that my Aamir Khan is lying?”

“No aunty, ‘your’ Aamir khan is not lying. He has not read the book and therefore he should not intervene in this.”

“Then why Aamir Khan said that author is shrewd? He must have read that book otherwise why he would poke his nose. Are they doing it to promote the movie?” “No Aunty, the movie is so good that it does not need any publicity. Why Aamir is doing this, we do not know. All I can say is unless…

“No but I know that Bhagat person is lying. The movie is very different from the book, I heard. In the movie, two side heroes go out in search of their college friend main hero and this was not there in the novel. The author is saying so to sell more books, get bigger money, and go to Hollywood”.

“Aunty that book is already a best seller for some last five years. The writer has launched 3 more books after that and all of them were best sellers. In fact, they have already made a movie on his second book. The controversy is point less, except the makers, a million people has read the book agrees that story is from book. Moreover, scenes in a movie will be different from the chapters in the book as the medium of story telling is different. The basic plot remains same as the story of 3 boys who came from different backgrounds meets each other in an engineering college and their years there.”

Hmmm betaji is movie mein bhi aisa hi hai but book mein nahi likha hai na ki dono dost teesre ko dhoondne jaate hai”. “Aunty, a book can be adopted but can not be completely copied as in a movie, a story is the writer’s imagination and a movie, a director’ vision.”

“Woh to thik hai but if this writer is that good then why did he make that crap call centre movie? Main aur Mr. Khanna went together to see this movie, together hamare head mein headache ho gaya. Khamkha waste of Rs 600 on PVR ticket. Hum to sallu ko dekhne gaye the but heard that he was also angry with the film. If this Chopra had seen that movie, he would never have taken this bhagat singh guy. I have heard that this writer writes books only for small town non English population and he has no literary sense.”

“Auntyyy [by this time I got my head mein headache], Chetan Bhagat just gave the story from his book- One night at call centre and not directed the film. Moreover, the film failed, not story. One failure does not mean that a person cannot start again. This writer is one of the best selling, widely popular English authors in India and that is more important than how many alliterations are in the first page of a novel”.

“Hmmm you are right but this writer signed the contract and agreed then. That Raju Chopra has even uploaded the contract on his website. I even saw writer twitting away to glory about the movie, director and everyone. So why is he making so much of fuss now, why was he quite all this time?”

“You are right aunty and I guess that is the basic issue. No, not about you being right but the entire episode of washing the personal linen in public. Both the parties should sort out the issue maturely instead of calling each other dirty names. Writers and filmmakers need each other and stirring pointless controversies like these will only add to creative loss. By the way aunty did u say twitter, are you on twitter? What will you do there, I mean wow what is your twitter id?”

“Hee he beta, you know na these days every body who is anybody, is on twitter. I never used to understand all this bird-whale business until I heard that apna favorite Shah Rukh Khan has also joined this twitter. Since then I cannot stop myself and requested your uncle to teach me. Funny as there was a time when my grand mother’s grand mother use to send messages via pigeons and now after 100 years, am sending message through this virtual bird err Is it pigeon or sparrow? Whatever, I am so glad that I can talk to my children pinky- sonu via twitter. God bless this twitter bird, for now I need not have to knock sonu’ room ask him to eat, I just send him tweet. My daughter is doing her masters through distance learning course via twitter. She says- ma its kewl! Sach mein beta, bhala ho twitter walo ka. Kewl must be one of her professors. Arre you also do lot of that what blocking things on Internet na, what is that?”

“That is blogging aunty and Kewl is not any college professor but it means cool but please do not ask what does that mean [my readers must be already growling]”.

“Oh! Blogging right. Your mom was telling that you were picking well and then you started playing some stupid farm games and keep hooked to it all the time. She was telling how many people were telling that you are very good writer and asked you to continue writing and turn author like many other blockers do”.

“Bloggers aunty”. “Yes, I heard how people first write blogs, become authors and publish their books. Who know you can be next Chetan Bhagat. However, I still think that he is the culprit as my Aamir khan is never wrong. See he saved Indian farmers from paying tax…

“Aunty, we discussed na that with due respect to actor, he should abstain from commenting as he has allegedly not read the book yet”. [Also, people ask me to write books as I write long posts [like this] and they get bored. I am no talented].

“Yes beta, you are so right. These people should call a neutral party may be someone like you to compare and help resolve the conflict without having any vested interest, why like you, may be you as you explained it so nicely to me. Warna mein kya-kya sochti. BTW beta, you must be on twitter also na. What is your “alias”? Mine is- My-name-is-Khanna; add me as friend”.

“Sure aunty. I would hee he love to help them resolve this conflict n regain peace. [Is a certain Mr. VVC listening :0)] In addition, my twitter id is- Numerounity! Tweet tweet tee hoo!

The autor is half Human, half machine. Go Figure or just revel in what I write


  1. Anonymous05 January

    Your timing and humor is amazing!

  2. Ekta going by ur blogging skills you are worth falling in love with :).


  3. Haha that was total fun.... nice yaar....ha ha ha ... by the way,... yeh aunty 2 states ke koi character se nahi milte?

  4. LOL!!!

    Aunties like these are found in abundance in our country. *sigh*

    GREAT post!!

    And yeah, you SHOULD watch 3 Idiots...it's a sooper doooper fanatbulous etc etc movie!! ha ha ha ha


  5. @ Surya

    Thanks buddy! :)

    @ Alabhya

    So, when are you giving me that 24 karat solitaire with a proposal? I am waiting;)

  6. @ Rohit
    Thanks Rohit, that aunty is a caricature of many real life characters incl a cousin and a friend of mine who ask the questions in exactly the same way or may be worse:)

    @ Bondgalz
    Thanks buddy! You rock too! I have watched the movie, it is cool.

  7. Hoo!! nice one Ekta!!! humorous and nice!! i loved the aunty's twittering knowledge here!! you had full on super conversation with the " imaginative" aunty :)

    The topic per se is debatable ( which will soon be on my post!! ) , but i would rather love to read the post more for the humor than the actual controversy!! I can only imagine what would have happened if u were stuck with dat lady for a day !! tere head mein hole ho jaata :P

    And yea.. wonderful concept of promoting your twitter page ( unique strategy ! ) ..

    all in all .. nice piece!!


  8. @ Rammy

    Thanks a ton! What a blast- thandi saans ka :)

    Mere head mein hole hota ya nahi but tum sab ke zaroor ho jaata...padhne ke pehle hi bol diya- long post...huh huh...ab tarife karte raho! Lolz:)

  9. Nice but thoda .. 3i ki story ke baare mein bhi likhana tha .. I mean .. even though people are becoming more aware and are less like the professor .. but still we have parents forcing kids into everything from tennis cricket, Judo, languages, olympiads if its the story of upper middle class and
    Forcing kids into the same old .. padhai to be a good doc/ engineer if the family if in a small town/city.
    Its was fun to watch movie and really picturesque Ladakh..! but sadly I guess no parents are taking home anything from it ..

  10. i m feeling jealous of u
    u have 77 followers
    and i have only 12.


  11. and I really hope VVC or any of those partners in crime read this ! :D Aunty is one of the best characters to have appeared in the blogs !! :D :D I loved her innocence so much that I wanted to strangle her to death each time she started the 'he saved the villagers' bit...:D :D :D

    Keep 'em coming ! and guess what, Im blogrolling you right away ! :D

  12. Aha!!! Thats a nice way to put up both the sides!!! Mostly the people who have not read the book have this perception about the CB & book!!!! But I wonder how can the makers be such a big cheat and get away with it!!!

    Loved the hilarious take ;-)

  13. @ Neeraj
    Thanks buddy, I heartily agree with your point and will try to put across the same sometime very soon. I wanted to write few more things here but was lil worried of the post getting long, hence relented. No worry shall def touch those sentiments soon.

    @ Akash
    Don't worry as I am your follower and that makes your following scale to 12+77 :)

  14. @ Vimmmuu

    Thanks for blogrolling me:)

    I conveyed your fond msg to ur beloved aunty. She smiled n expressed her desire to read ur blogs. After reading them, she was impressed with ur intelligence n further requested me to give her ur contact no. She apparently wanted to have next Q&A round with you :)

    @ Smita
    Thanks buddy. I have seen the agreement an believe that chetan is taken for ride and some smart chap at VVC fooled him royally. He sold the rights at mere 10 lacs. Phew!

  15. ok, heres my number :

    :D :D :D :D

  16. lol
    thanks for the nice read :)

  17. oooo Ekta...quite some stuff... yeah the SRK twitter hype is like vooo hoooo!! rumor at its best !! :D , luv this gossip kinda

  18. @ Vimmuuu
    99-aunty wants to have another discussion with vimmuu-81, hence the request. Anyways, you can still have a good discussion with her- topic of ur choice! Game?

    @ Sorcerer
    Thanks. keep visiting:)

    @ HaRy
    Thanks HaRy. Its lovely to hear from you. Like Vimmuuu do u too wanna call aunty at ur blogs? :)

  19. Very nice and humorous. Did not feel like reading a blog. Felt like listening two people's conversation in front of me.

  20. @ SG

    Thanks, thats actually a big compliment:) :)

  21. nice post Ekta.

    If you see Aamir is like that only, he always take credit of someone other. Remember Tare zameen par, he take the story from marathi writer Amol Gupte and after movie is super hit then Aamir just eliminates his name.

  22. noooooooooo but gossips alone i can adjust :)

  23. oh oh oh.... your aunt seems to be a Amir Khan loyalist... she couldn't take it at all....

    anyway if somebody disn't read the book means they used to think like this with the kind of image Aamir has...

  24. lolz...too good ya

  25. @ Mazamanoj007
    Thanks Manoj. Maybe you are right but I believe a lot of things go behind the scenes. Yeah I too ve heard about TZP' controversy. Reg 3idiots, it is more of the producer's call. Keep writing! :)

    Sure, will try to bring some more for the pure sake of gossip for you:)

  26. @ Kanagu

    Than ks for writing in. Well Khanna aunty is not just mine but hum sabki aunty hai! lolz..lolz

    waise she loves apna "sallu" and SRK too :)

    @ Nazish Rahman
    Thanks Nazish, seeing you after such a lng time. Keep writing. take care:)

  27. hey..I guess you still remember me.I was off for a long time.very long infact.!

    Well I saw the movie.Thought I was entertaining.just that ! Added enuf masala to make it a box office hit.I expected it coz Bagath boy's book was excelent to read but I wondered what thrill would it make while converting it into a film.3i 's all those masala works have worked.

    Heard about the issue on claims and credits later.Din waste my time givin my ears to them coz i felt they are just publicity stunts....eh :-p.

  28. @ Rahul

    yes, I do remember you:)

    So, how are things at ur end? Nice intelligent boy you are to not waste ur time on the controversies. If you had not, you must have posted it in ur blog n in that case who wud ve read my stuff here. thanks buddy:)

  29. Ha ha...enjoyed reading it. Jus stumbled upon ur blog n it was worth it.
    Keep it up!

  30. Hilarious post!! You have a flair for writing... I was laughing my head off all the way!!
    Loved it:)

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  32. Hey !!...How are you doing long time???...Tell me honestly,does this Aunty exists or this was a fiction.....However, if it was fiction I think there could not have been a better way of putting across this debate and if it was real, you can turn out to be a hell of an interviewer, compeer, anchor for you direct the discussion very well.........But try writing these into books....you have it in you.

  33. @Shas
    thanks for stopping by. Hope to see you here regularly. take care:)

    @ The Panorama
    Thanks a ton. I am glad that u liked my post. Keep visiting:)

  34. @ Peter aka Bharath Reddy

    Thanks for writing in. I shall consider n let you know. For further details kindly write me at ekhetan@gmail.com. Thanks

    @ Rahul
    Thank you buddy. i shall consider it provided penguin wants to publish it. lolz:)

  35. All said and done, its a good entertainer, and thats what matters.

  36. @ Haddock

    Thanks buddy. I visited your blog too, was mesmerized with all the delicacies u ve written about there. Could not comment due to tech issues. Take care n Keep visiting.

  37. That was fun read. Lol, here is an 'Aunt' who tweets, blogs and also does some farming! ;))

    Thanks for stopping by at my blog page. And glad to meet another who writes loooong blogs! :P

  38. @ Shail
    Welcome to my blog buddy and I hope you are here to stay. Do not worry about the long posts...heehee trying to shorten them:)

    Yeah the aunt is cool but does not farm yet. Aunty ko farming karwaye kya? :)

  39. hey Ekta, lovely post... this is one of ur most interesting posts.... i loved it. :))))))))))))))

  40. @ Sonu anand
    Thanks buddy! :)


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