Jai Jawan; Jai Kisaan & 3 Idiots

November 28, 2009 , 46 Comments

“When you want something, the entire universe conspires in helping you to achieve it”- Paulo Coelho.“Only if we know what we want”- Ekta Khetan

If you have seen the latest promos of “Three Idiots”, you will understand the irony of taking aging stars in the role of a college-going youth. [What else did you think? Another preachy post?] one hand its about college-goers as confused as George Bush (Jr.) when they are on the verge of deciding about career and future life.. on the other hand, its a paradox of having 3 people we won't readily expect to be cast in this film, leaving us confused about what we want.. Do we want younger guys who can aptly fit into the role looking their age? or do we want real strong actors like Aamir, Madhavan, and Sharman who don't really look college-guys but won't let us even feel their age while acting the script out...? Ahhh, did I manage to confuse you too?

Coming back to alchemy, of course, I was never really sure about what I exactly wanted in life. For I wanted to be so many things. Like.. being a doctor (pediatrician/psychiatrist), pilot, teacher, a leader... or maybe a farmer. Yes, you read it right. I always wanted to be a farmer. Management happened by chance [MBC], or maybe is it a conspiracy of the universe to bring me closer to my dream. Therefore, what the universe conspired, Facebook finally inspired.

Yes, this is about my latest addiction to “Farmville” on Facebook. I can play this game for the entire day and night. Trust me! It is very addictive. For uninitiated ones, it is a real-time [can I call it that?] Farm game where you can grow crops, rear the animals, harvest the fruit trees, build architectures and can decorate your farm. Interestingly, these activities give you Virtual experience points or XP and coins. The XP determines your farming level and coins, your purchasing parity & there are some award ribbons which adds to the former two. There is crop mastery, mystery boxes, lost animals and a lot of decorative items. The game is an interactive, Mutually Inclusive and collectively exclusive [MICE] multiplayer game where you can induct new/other players in your neighborhood to exchange gifts, clean their farm and fertilize their crops too. Interesting? Well, you have to play once to know what I am talking about and why am I so addicted.

Well well, this post is not about the “Dummy’s guide to Farmville” [unless their product team pays me to do that hehe]. It is a story of my addiction and it certainly tells you about my conspicuous absence from blogging. I was down with a web 2.0 fever and the name of the disease is- “Alpha-farma-dopamine” [a behavioral cousin of dopamine which explains the smoking tendencies of ppl]

“Alpha-farma-mine” is the new virus as spread by/on facebook. The virus got its name from three contemporary elements viz- 1. Alpha Pup 2. Farmville 3. Dopamine

Symptoms of this disease: You are down with “Alpha-farma-dopamine” when-
1. You are not preggers still you have constant cravings; for the Internet and cannot wait to go online.
2. 90% & above of your holidays/ leisure hours are spent on Facebook playing Farmville
3. You abstain from visiting places/travel which doesn’t allow you online connectivity
4. You make new friends only to add them as a neighbor
5. Your communications- mail, SMS, scraps, discussions or even chat spells in or around F-A-R-M-V-I-L-L-E [like Hey farmgirl, how r u doing? You made my farm look so good; Tee How do v get flower bouquets in farm]
6. Your FB homepage is filled with Farmville notifications
7. You forget your friend/family’ birthday but remember that you have planted “pumpkins” 8 hours ago in your farm and you need to harvest it before it rots off
8. Your personal experience [if any]…

The P&L of side effects-
1. Social risk: Decreased real-life interactions or increased online friends
2. Physical risk: Loss of appetite and sleep [ a syndrome where you cultivate oodles of veg, fruits n grains but forget to eat ur own]; RSI aka repetitive strain injury due to constant mouse clicking
3. Financial Risk: Increased Internet bills, credit card spend
4. Information security risk: I've FB password of two of my friends, how else should I explain this:)
5. Romantic risk: Suppose your girlfriend ask you to join FV for the heck of helping her on the farm and gets upset when you do not meet expectation. She even asks you to share your FB password so that she can log with ur account to help her in farming and you refuse!
6. Your personal experience [if any]…

The FV virus is a fast-spreading pandemic and does not need a personal touch to contaminate. It has the potential to infect almost every user who comes in picture. The 40% of the facebook junta that is not yet infested by FV germs are basically people who have not yet tried/tasted/heard about this game or are busy playing “Mafia war” on FB

So, I was down with “Alpha farma dopamine” or AFD and displayed all of the above symptoms and compliance until it reached level 33, and continues. There were no antidotes but the time, which, has once again proved that it is a healer yet a bad strategy. The fever continues but it had made me quite weary. A young girl like me who should ideally be jumping in her boy friend’s arms [doing zoobi doobi do baah], was actually sitting alone with a bulky laptop in her arms. It has made me do some strangest of things, for e.g.

'Alpha Farma dopamine' se “Darne ka nahi; ladne ka”
The dreaded swine flu is a history now. It died a shameful death after tons of pharmacy & media houses made enough profits by capitalizing on its wave. [The new wave to rock the world is Google wave. This reminds that I do not yet have my GW invitation yet.] However, it has almost similar symptoms as FV flu - socially contaminable, multiplies quickly and involves time-based treatment.

The prescription is simple and may be inversely proportionate to the cure of other dopamine related reinforcements like smoking, crying etc. Once you are diagnosed and self quarantined, you can either - invest the time in doing something creative like reading my blogs or continue playing the game till you reach a saturation point [Mine started showing already]

AFD as a tool for education, development & world peaceFarmville is indeed an interesting game and has exciting prospects in entrepreneurship, non-violence and world peace. It is far more productive unlike Robocop, Road Rash of the world. For e.g, If Miss Elsamma used it for teaching Math, science and economics, I had been a national topper lolz. If our erstwhile PM Mr. Lal Bahadur Shastri has combined this software with his slogan- Jai Jawan, Jai Kissan, “Silicon valley” would have found a new threat from Indians in 'chilly-corn' valley AKA Agricultural industry. Imagine its contribution to world peace. We can win the war against terrorism by spreading the AFD virus in Pakistan and other Anti Indian military camps. Instead of dropping atom bomb & threatening with nuclear ammunitions, the warring neighbors could lawfully visit each other’s premise, help them in clearing weeds and even fertilize the crop. It has such a prospect of converting the entire bloody revolution to the green revolution. Green ocean strategy anyone? MNS thieves oops chiefs, are you listening too?

Think; think what all benefits AFD can bring to humanity. The boring management books will find a new lesson besides Mahabharata & Ramayana to teach strategy, decision making & analysis. May be some of the over rated IIM-IIT-ISB’ans will think beyond fat paychecks and “phoren” coolie-giris. May be we will have more people like agriculturists R Madhavan. It is after all only 30% tilling and rest is managements. I can envision Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam addressing the entire world and saying we may not need a million farmers, few facebookers are sufficient :)

Eeeeeeeeks I am spending too much of time writing this post. My crops in Farmville are ready to harvest and I must attain my target of reaching level 34 within 6 days without buying too much of hale bays like some of my friend do. See you. Bahbyee. BTW, I or my family do not remember the exact time of my birth. It was sometime early in the morning though-Brahma muhurat. Nor have they predicted my career path then. But yeah, ever since they have bought me lots of "runner shoes" though. And tab se "Bhaiyya All iz well" :)

Run ekta run; life is a race and farmville is no exception...kuk doo cooo!!!
PS: if you are my friend on FV and are above level 31, Pl send me “olive trees” and the new items on the free gift list for friends. [Some habits die hard:)] So bolo... Nah!...Jai Jawan, Jai Kissan!

The autor is half Human, half machine. Go Figure or just revel in what I write


  1. Jai jawan, jai kisan!!!! nice blog and now u hv had enough of FV...

  2. Hilarious and cool post !
    Being a borderline FV addict myself I know what u were exactly talkin about ;) :P
    Kudos !
    Keep up the good work :)

  3. a looong post dear!!!

    I tried reading but in a tearing hurry!! But I have always wondered whats this hoophalla about Farmville, whoever plays it gets addicted to it!!!

    Will be back soon to comment properly :)

  4. @ Mayank
    Thank you.

    @ SC
    Thanks buddy:)

    @ Smita
    YUp it looks a longer post buddy but there is a picture and few bullet points that making it long:)

    I would love to see ur comments once u read this..I am sure u would like this:)

  5. cool posts...thanks for sharing the stories of R Madhavan....it was really very inspiring for an aspiring Entrepreneur like me. Thanks once again.

  6. @ ZB
    Thanks buddy for liking my post...HOpe to see the budding entrepreneur in u taking wings soon:)

  7. This comment has been removed by the author.

  8. "When you want something, the entire universe conspires in helping you to achieve it" this is same theory by rhonda byrne in "The secret" ..... well I don't believe in that, we get whatever destiny destined for us anyhow just like u wanted to be a farmer but u r MBC :D

    FV and mafia were total addiction for me too, in fact I was care more about being punctual in harvesting crops rather than study and job..... how silly it was but thank god I dared to remove all those applications one day. :)

    I hope you N'joy FV

  9. Thanks for sharing of three idiots.
    I read an interview of Amir Khan where he justified his playing a 22year old and said he WORKED towards this.

  10. This comment has been removed by the author.

  11. Not yet inflicted with the FV virus but nice post anyways.. Sent u a GW invite ...

  12. @ MazaManoj
    I am also seriously contemplating to do the same with FV and restaurent city...Once done i am sure I may not try to start again:)

    Keep writing in:)

    @ BKCji
    Hmmm but the age starts showing...He was still ok in DCH...here in some frames, age is showing on him and others:)

    @ Neeraj

    Thanks Neeraj I saw ur mail...Hey it needs google chrome etc...need to upgrade...thanks for the invite anyway:) Keep writing

  13. @ekta Use mozilla instead :)

  14. @ Neeraj
    HI, am using office laptop as of now, cant change the browser:(

    Planning to get my soon...will do the nedful:)

  15. hey ekta.... thanks for sharing this..... i did try FV but could notundrstand it on the day one and quit..... I am happy ... all the best... show me ur farm someday :-)

  16. @ Sonu anand

    FV is a very simple game...You can plow, harvest crops, trees and do animal farming...You can check their help file...You can catch my farm there too:)

    So, did you liked my post?

  17. lol you are the second blogger i have read today about farmsville addiction :| and I dont even know what it is :P hehe

  18. Hi, the opening line is not originally written by paulo coelho. Its an ancient Chinese saying, thought to be a quote by Confucius ( the founder of Confucius religion around 2000 years ago).

    Poulo coelho has just borrowed it and quoted it in The Alchemist. TC :)

  19. a nice and long post :)

    Me too got addicted to farmville but attained a saturated condition now..... :) and you are in 33rd level.. phew...

    and for 3 idiots.. its a marketing strategy... who will buy a film with 3 youngsters and also knowing our filmmakers ability to convert a novel into a film....

    I have completed the tag you have given me...


  20. Ok now tell me, was this post only on Farmville ??? This was more like a Navratna Gravy; it had everything ! :D :D :D :D

    Thank Blogging, I never had the bandwidth to even open a FB account ! :D :D :D Theres no way Im giving myself to such addictions !!

  21. @ Aditya

    Let me know the first one so that i can see if our exp match or we can be neighbours on farmvilee..lol:) Nice to have you here. FV is a game well understood when played...it is very simple n am always ready for help:)

    @ ZB
    Thanks for the enlightenment buddy. After reading "The zahir" i wondered if this the same author who has written a miracle called "The Alchemist". There is lot in chinese metaphysical sciences to be explored...

    @ Kanagu
    Thanks dear. It got long with the diagram n bullet points i however tried to keep it short:( Will try a 55 fiction next time:)
    I am in level 34 and want to finish 2-3 more before giving up. I shall sure come to ur page n see the tag. THanks:)

  22. @ Vimmuuu
    It started with FV as the concept but as it progressed, it found its metaphors and similies and the works! Navratana is a great compliment if you meant that way:)

    yeah FB was tough for me too earlier but now since i have started, there is no looking back [as of now] :)

  23. Anonymous02 December

    Just now started playing FV. Have a Wonderful neighbor who fertilizes crops, sends gifts and invites :)

    Glad that my farm is taken care of, when I am not around. Feel, so thankful! And lots of Gratitude!!

    Good you did not become a doctor, pilot or teacher. For they cannot imagine bringing about world peace, non-violence and global harmony.

    All of us have felt it that there is something wrong with the world. We don't know what it is, but it is always there like a splinter in our minds, driving us mad.

    Few choose to make a difference and you started out by becoming a virtual farmer cultivating the aspect of giving in our lives. The door can only be shown but we have to walk through it.

    Hope, many will take your example and follow suit.Once we stop the distortion, the physiology begins to work; The chemistry comes right; And there are really wonderful healing stories to be told here.

    Thanks for your good intent and best wishes for your farm :)

  24. @ Surya

    I am absolutely speechless buddy! :) Thanks anyways:)

  25. Wow!! looks like the FV has struck you big time!!!...some post this is!! i have got quite some invites for the FV game. Havent checked it out though!! ... and the second one.. the movie 3 idiots ... i have had the same doubts as wrt the age factor of the actors.. but i guess we can only know the real result wen we see the movie ( u can read the comments on the movie on my blog!! ). But the music is mind blowing. I love each song in the flick. All izz well is ofcourse a catchy number, but i love the Jaane nahin denge tujhe like mad!! .. the songs remind me of the college days that i had !! the fun the small sad moments and collectively the amazing 4 years!!

    So ... Miss ekta .. may u have the FV virus on you for long time to come !! .. happy farming!!

    Jai Jawan ,Jai Kisan , Jai FV and Jai Ekta!!

    needless to say nice post!! as usual!!


  26. @ Rammy

    All I will say- Jai jawan, jai naam ka kissan bhi hai..Jai Fv koi hoga but yeh ekta wala jai koun hai? ;)

  27. @ RammyII

    Subh subh bolo...I am trying to get off the FV game soon:)

    Yes, I liked the 3idiot's songs too...all izz well is great and so does zoobi doobi doobah and the sunshine one...

  28. hahaha.. funny post from the start to the end.. I am unfortunately immune to AFD.. one the rare ones. n me likes all izz well song as well..


  29. @ Hemish
    Thanks buddy. Tum zaroor "lifeboy" use karte ho:)

    All izz well is good one..

  30. when I was small my dad never allowed me to write on the wall (even got good spanking for the same)
    and now every Tom Dick and Harry is writing on my wall.

  31. @ Haddock
    Billions of blistering blue barnacles, what happened to your walll and err if u do not mind it who are you? :)

  32. oo I missed yur post some how... saw the trailer after reading this...quite interesting yes and boy Have been reading sooo many blogs lately on farmville....boy i dont wanna get stuck on this...i know ll get addicted, so better not start gettin into it.....and i agree yu a MBA ..with the diag:) ha ha...eww am blah'ing away!

  33. Wah, ye badhiya hai 'Farmville' ke liye beg karna Olive trees.. Sooper.. FB shud honor u for promoting that stooopid game... Heehaw... ya I am sick of receiving gifts and request of playing it... I have also been threatened by one friend of never-speaking if I do not increase her points n levels or whatever that is... Pheeww.

  34. @ Hary

    Thanks and you keep blahing a lot these days and miss my post! :D

  35. @ Vee
    Actually you are right...even i am bored with this game...but yeh moh-maya hai ki peecha hi nahi chodti hai:D

  36. 'Moh' I can understand, but what's got 'Maya' to do with ur addiction...? Oh Wait! Are u being paid to play it??? Holy Freak... Teach me how to play... I want Maya too....

  37. @ Vee
    No Maya comes to me in real terms sigh...I wish if I were paid to play this and build such a beautiful farm that I did:)

  38. nice blog
    have to visit again to read full post.

  39. @ SM

    Thanks. I shall look forward to ur comments once you finish reading the post:)

  40. Hi Friend.. This is Vijay here.. Ur doing a good job.. Shall we exchange links...

  41. sahi hai... i know ppl who have woken up in the middle of the night to harvest their farms! If real life farming was this easy, India would not have a food crisis brewing ;-) But it is addicting once you start it... and then comes a phase where you ask - "why the hell am i still clicking?"

  42. @ Vijay

    Hi, thanks for writing in. what links?

    @ eye-in-sty

    After such a long time buddy! where were thou?

    Yup i truly agree with you n know some such crazy chap too:)

    I even agree the latter part! serioulsy it becomes very juvenile later!

    BTW wait for a complete new post tomo at numerounity:)

  43. I was away n busy with work... how are you? will await the post eagerly.

  44. @ eye-in-sty-in

    Me fine...the new post is already there, waiting for ur comments:)


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