Who Killed Sushant Singh Rajput- Bullying, Depression, Lockdown Helplessness or Ambition?

June 17, 2020 0 Comments

It came as a piece of news and soon settled in as a shock, the stoned cold shock that continued even 2 days after his death. As a viewer, I was quite indifferent to the actor's TV stint or upcoming movies. I have seen multiple movies of him [some twice] wherein I liked few and few, I did not like much. It is a normal viewer reaction, amounted equally for all actors- so-called Industry Insiders or outsiders.

While I failed to understand the concept of Industry insider and outsider. For me, all actors are part of the industry especially if they are at least a film or two old. And according to me, Sushant Singh Rajput in spite his boy next door look [ a new, refreshing trend inBollywood] was doing seemingly quite well. He had a stellar list of films wherein he played different characters. A feat that a lot of so-called Industry insiders do not get in their nepotism feathered hats. And that was an outstanding achievement for a TV star after Shah Rukh Khan. The point is not about he being a TV star or being inferior. We all have learned the hard work and hardship that our prime time actors go through shooting "leaps of generations soaps". No matter how many of them aspire to recreate the same magic on the bigger screen, rarely few could succeed, and Sushant Singh R was a brilliant exception. He was not only a prime-time blue-eyed boy but made quite an entry with his first film- Kai Po Che, a multi-starrer with 2 other well-known actors. 

Despite huge popularity, Sadly his name did not figure in any of the best actor/debutante awards until the release of the cult movie- MS Dhoni. However, none of us noticed or perhaps minced words about it. Maybe he did win some awards if not Filmfare. 

But then we know the circus that Indian Film awards are. Yet the circus has sometimes awarded some genuine actors and artists and we wonder how SSR name never sparked a strong candidature unless the untold story of MS Dhoni, a film that made you confuse that who is the real Dhoni? The actor or the cricketer on whose life the film was based. The film indeed had some evergreen songs as well, with one being my most favorite.

The song still haunts me and is my best companion during the time of distress. I have played the song in loop [female version] ever since the release and wondered why is it not given the cult status, a status it deserved. 

Before MS Dhoni, Sushant Singh Rajput had another film released in 2015- Detective Byomkesh Bakshy, another hidden gem starring the actor. I have recently seen the film during the lockdown and could not stop raving at the way it weaved the Byomkesh Bakshy's stories and characters from its more popular TV series. If you have not seen that film, watch it and you will be amazed as I was. 

He also starred in Shuddh Desi Romance [a film that I watched twice and liked], PK [a small but visible role in a big-banner project], Raabta, Kedarnath [another beautiful film which you first like due to Sara Ali Khan but later find her OTT and like the under-dog hero fo the film], Sonchiriya [heard it is another awesome movie] 

What does not kills you, makes you stronger! But what could not make you further stronger, kills you! And guess that's what happened in the actor's case. 

So many varied reasons and emotions may swing in your heart but the truth remained unspoken and unexpressed. The only person who knew the absolute true version left leaving it on everyone's guess and media manipulations. The kind of nonsense you see post the demise of him on social media esp TikTok is so heartbreaking. It seems everyone who would have never made a clip on his performance or songs earlier, is now either giving a version of his tryst, his last hours, reactions of his death and some real non-time stamped videos posing as "exclusive footage". The cyber cell that to date had no issue over pictures of late Divya Bharti[another controversial celeb death], has immediately reacted on circulation of SSR's picture which looked lesser anguishing than hers. Why? What happens to the request of the family to probe into the case? An actor who was good with verses and technology left no note but a deleted tweet? But then we all know how the media carpets truths over stories they want to sell.

A harsh reality, sad turn of events but the person is gone now. A seemingly healthy, sane, ambitious person. He was the AIEEE 7th rank holder who though dropped out during his engineering semesters to follow his ambition of becoming an actor. An ambition that made an academically bright, hailing from a good family boy, start by being a background dancer. Give it to his merit that he had a successful stint on the small screen and transitioned from there to the prestigious YRF banner. A banner that a lot of star kids do not get to work with, whatever the insider scoop it maybe. 

An ambition that did not restrict Sushant Singh Rajput to a one-time wonder boy but had his opportunities to work in some wonderful projects with well-known directors. Let's not talk about the un-materialized projects cause even the brightest and closest in the industry has to undergo such crisis sometimes wherein prestigious and overwhelming projects are shelved. The idea is to keep playing the innings, stay relevant, which I think the departed star did quite well in spite of his feeling of being "left-out". 

Was it the Fear of Missing Out? A FOMO of not being part of some popular coterie in Bollywood? or the failures he faced during the rind? You may never know what breaks a person's heart. A person so ambitious and resourceful to buy the exotic-expensive favorite childhood car and even land on Moon, could not give up to that FOMO alone. Especially when his last released film[Chichore] was all about positivity and looking the bully in the eye. 

You cannot blame everything on failures cause, in this case, failures [if any] looked like a smaller part of the pie. No one in the industry was ever a "Failure-proof" and everyone had their own share of failures in the past and ongoing. An industry that is full of nepotism and casting couch horrors, gave however neglected actor Sushant Singh Rajput more opportunities than it gave to children of superstars in the nouveau era of cinema and content.  

But then there could be many reasons for depression, often accumulates in an unwanted collaboration that you may not be able to foresee or deal with. It is like when a lot of negativity darkens your alley, no matter how much you struggle, often it does not take you towards the light at the other side of the tunnel, so easily. Lone warriors often succumb to brutal accumulations. And IMHO, the fact that you are leaving away from the family does not help much either. 

It may or may not be a lack of shoulders to weep on, share the agony, and expect to accept/settling pacifications. Sometime lack of actions, immediate actions could act against the recovery. The times are such that even the braves are likely to throw themselves to an opportunity of peace or bewildered consolations. 

And while we do not know what actually triggered an educated, bright, meritorious, financially stable young men at his 34 to throw up his hands, speculations aside. Least we can do, is to respect him and be more mindful with people around- direct or indirect. 

For you never know how a small remark could tear apart the silent sufferers, least you would like to be is to be responsible for someone's sorrows. 

While I request you to refrain from making any unkind gesture towards the departed soul, let's pray that no other person is withdrawn to such circumstances wherein he/she ends their life. 

Om Shanti.

The autor is half Human, half machine. Go Figure or just revel in what I write

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