How I Survived my Food Fix with Ketchup, Bhujia and Maya Akka

When West met South

her heart came to her mouth

Food you never thought could cause you such ache

Wanna know about my Food fix Experience at Southern Landscape?

Well, you would have heard many stories about the rift between North and South. Trust me if food sets you apart, it also brings you closer. I am a living example of what multi-cuisine dreams are made of. 

A little about me before you laugh over my food fix

I am a Rajasthani born in Bihar and brought up in Bihar, Madhya Pradesh, Bengal and Chattisgarh. I graduated in Nagpur, post-graduation in Chennai and have lived in cities like Hyderabad, Bangalore, Gurgaon, and Mumbai to name a few. My upbringing was done amid fierce Punjabis, Bengalis and Marwadis. Care you ask me about my food habits and I would say- ummm, ummm and even bigger..ummmmm. 

South India is not just Tamil Nadu and South Indian Food is not just Masala Dosa or Idly

I was very fond of South Indian food. Every Sunday, my mom would either make hot piping idlis or Masala Dosa. The Foodie me was a meagre eater until I started living in a hostel. My first stay away from home was at Nagpur and I kinda survived the food served in my hostel with a bottle of pickles that would get over as soon I opened them in the hostel mess. Vada pav, Maggi and Samosa at the College Canteen helped me survive my Nagpur sojourn. The real trouble began when I decided to stay in Chennai for my MBA

It was then I realized that South Indian food is not just about Masala Dosai and Idlis. There is- Tahir Sadam, Sambhar Sadam, Rasam Appalam, Appam, Pongal, Patachaddy, Dosai, Avial, Kesari bath and more. And if your college and Hostel is a home for students from Kerela, Karnataka, Tamil Nadu, Andhra Pradesh and Pondicherry, expect to either transform or survive like I did.

Another feather in my cap- I was a vegetarian who didn't like eating coconut oil. I was in Chennai for 2 years of my MBA, on-campus, full-time, with people who called Parantha either Parotha or Barotha.

Food and Murphy's law

In our college, there was a fixed time for breakfast, lunch, evening tiffin and dinner.  If you are late, forget the food and sit through lectures where one of the guys sits behind you and burps loudly. I was sharing my room with 4 other girls who, were though doing their MS but were fascinated with their beauty, make-up and a secret course in bathroom singing, delaying me every day for class.

My college building was the farthest on the campus and I wondered how the moms of day scholars could send them so hungry that they would finish off all the breakfast available on campus minutes before the classes begin. 

via GIPHY

To sum up my food woes-

1) Always late for hostel breakfast

2) Elaborate lunch thalis wherein I have to walk Kms to reach Lunch hall crossing the man-made river and valley [yes you need to be at Jeppiar to see that] to eat a thali that would be full of food variety that you neither have heard of nor could comprehend the name ever.

3) Being forced to eat a food that neither suited my palate nor had any taste and would have seemed to come from Planet Pluto.

4) If by mistake some decent food dared to enter the hostel canteen, it would be immediately pounced upon and devoured by enthusiast foodies who couldn't envisage the existence of other students who too would have liked to have a bite

5) Vegetarians ate vegetarian food, but non-vegetarians ate both and were larger in numbers.

In short- I was screwed by Food Fix at Chennai hinterland.

How I overcome my food fix

Necessity is the mother of all innovation. 

Movements outside college were restricted and even though I took special study permission to my cousin's house in IIT Madras for weekends, I still have to suffer my food fix for rest 6 days a week. 

Since I was the cousin of one of the well-known innovators in Indian telecom, innovation was my only armour to overcome my food fix and how. Away from the prying eyes of my health-conscious cousin, I picked up packets of haldiram bhujiya, Tomato ketchup, and Monaco Biscuits and stocked them near my hostel bed.

I have begun to like Sambhar Rice but only with Appalam. It took me a few minutes to convince a few girl gangs to help me hoard "ever out of stock" appalams and I was sorted. With great help from my comrades AKA Ketchup, Appalam and Bhujiya, I started having my dinner and holiday lunch at the hostel. Evenings would be taken care of with bhujiya and sauce spread on bread. The morning Dosais at the hostel remained a challenge.

And that is when my local Rajnikanth Maya Akka Came in!

Maya Akka was one of the female staff of the college. Tall, dark, well built, she was apparently the much-respected employee. There was another beautiful trait to her- she was quite kind.

Soon my stories of food adventures with ketchup, bhujiya went viral across the campus. No thanks to my roommates who wondered how I eat everything with bhujiya and sauce, Also, my class fellow boys who would help me buy my stock from the city. It was all discrete by the way, as our chairman firmly believed in

Girl girl jingle- is okay

Boy boy mingle- is okay

But if a girl and boy jingle and mingle- not okay

No rule ever said that Maya Akka could not save food for me though. Knowing my food woes, she would always keep some food for me from the breakfast stall and hand me over as soon I stepped to my college building. She ensured that I did not miss my breakfast on college days and would always be around the lunch hour to serve me more appalams with rice and Sambhar.

It was only because of a little help from Tomato sauce, bhujiya, appalam and gracious kindness from Maya Akka, did I survived my campus food fixed. My love for bhujiya went so viral that my roommate Darshana fondly named me - Hhaldiram Bhujiya, given My bhujiya survival skills, I appeared like a packet of Bhujiya to her who like others could not understand how I eat everything with ketchup and Bhujia. Hahaha

My food fix continued a little further when I started working for IIT Madras at their Adyar office wherein the lunch menu would be keerai rice, lemon rice, curd rice, tamarind rice and Masala Dosa. No point for guessing what a few colleagues of mine named me at the workplace basis my usual order of food ;)

By the way, today South Indian food is one of my favorite cuisines and I have finally fixed it :)

So if you come across a situation

Loaded with gourmet tribulation

do not cry foul,

instead, get started with Tiny OWL

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